ZenView
Mary Layton
Obstacles to Self-Discovery
The obstacles to fully discovering oneself may be that we are continuously emphasizing certain aspects of ourselves while neglecting others. We say we don’t have time. But it may be a matter of choices we make. Are we really trapped? I have noticed that people have a way of overdoing things. This isn’t just true with frivolous pursuits but also with activities that on the surface appear virtuous. The latter ones can be, in a hidden sort of way, just as self-destructive. We may need to question our priorities. For example, a priority could be wanting to take care of a lot of duties a.s.a.p. and getting them done well and quickly. We are racing with ourselves, time being our opponent. How much can we get done? Or we may be involved in taking care of other people and their problems, trying to help with their challenges while ignoring our own. We wonder why we’re feeling irritable and exhausted, somewhat dissatisfied.
I certainly got some of that obsession going on. I’m a fastidious cleaner. I want everything to look nice and tidy. I’m quite the slave driver, with me being the slave. It has happened that I go to sleep and ask myself whether being so fastidious with making order and cleaning the house continuously is all that essential. I always have the answer to that question. It really isn’t all that important. I’d rather have more time set aside to be creative, to uncover and develop the less known parts of myself. Go out, do something out of the ordinary. I may have to try something new, give up the comfort of doing the same old same old, even sacrifice not being so good all the time. I ask myself what is missing in my life. What would I do if it wasn’t too selfish? If it wasn’t too crazy? I think many people are caught in this dilemma. But wouldn’t it be better if we were more interested in discovering more about our true nature? It may bring lots of positive changes.
Sitting at home too much we miss all the wonderful things going on in our communities, but being constantly on the go and never finding rest, may also not lead to self-discovery. We need a bit of both. Time alone to meditate and enjoy just being there in the moment, as well as time to step into the unknown and walk the road less travelled. Discovering oneself is the work of a lifetime, requiring many attempts and learning by trial and error. Listen to the voice inside, to the longing of your soul. Your soul may want to run through a forest, sit by a stream, draw, paint, play music and dance. Sometimes do exactly what you thought you don’t like to do! Surprise yourself. Learn something new. Meet new people. Contacting anything new can give oneself an experience of a different dimension of oneself one hasn’t nourished and cultivated in a while or never before. Buddha said “There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth, not going all the way and not starting at all.”
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